Friends

Friends play a part in your everyday life, be it in big or small ways. I would say friends spend more time with you more than anyone else, sometimes even more than your partner.

Friends are always there for you to share your sorrow,joy and NONSENSE. For people that knows me, knows that Im FOS.

Sometimes, I'll try to msg some to check out on them, it's like part of my memory remains there, times when it was a table full of the "gossipers". But when I feel the feedback ain't that receptive, I hold back. Im glad keke is around, but I cant possibly throw everything to him, he aint superman though.
It aches me sometimes to see him so worn out after he returns from duty, especially today.

blood hound

The 2 monkeys in my life are growing up so fast, it's like I don't know them anymore. They look so different now, so grown up, which means Im aging!! Looking at my second sis reminds me of me back then, the exact scenario, the exact situation. The love lorn period. LOL.

It's like a flashback of my own "TEEN" days. I can't believe this, it feels so yesterday that I was feeling so ever lost and clueless of where my future is bringing me, which apparently is still a bother to me. Going through Sec 5, the O'levels and what not. I miss that phase (: it's the bitter sweet days, or should I say the last moments of me in that unsightly uniform. I read her blog, I feel her pain. When things aint working, and you;ve lost the will to fight for it no more, when letting go was the only way out of this misery. It takes 2 to tango, which I believe she gave all she could, waiting and waiting. That fella is in for a rude awakening to lose a girl like my sis. That's the problem with the "Tan sisters" we love with all we got. So much so that, sometimes, we just stop. Stop in our track, fear the next step we're gonna make.

One thing Im proud of, she's able to stand up from her setbacks and not let people bring her down. Though it's killing her inside, she puts up a brave front and move on. You go girl. Keep these distractions aside, and focus on your upcoming exams. Though the road is still as windy and long, keep moving on for you will never know what's going to show up next at the other end of it. I've got your back sissy, just so you know. (:

Rainy morning

Im lucky to have forgetfulness as memory.. (:

Pictures speaks a thousand words, love this natural shot, I can't help it, it's the smile and that candid shot.

Home alone

Im done with the "cleaning up" not sure if it's considered cleaned up. LOL

Shall laze a while more before I head out to get the bills done.

-Edited-

Back from whitesands. Settled the bills and waiting for the jellies to be done. Wonder if it'll taste nice, I've added aloe vera pulps in it, cant help it (:

So fast my off day is coming to an end, back to work tomorrow UGH. Can I take another 2 weeks leave?..

Insomnia

I cant fall back asleep after mum woke me up while I was lying on the sofa. Can't believe I've actually sat for 2 papers, one more to go later and Im done for Sem 1. The peeps will be heading down to Changi V tomorrow after the paper, final class gathering before the sem resumes. All the best everyone. Im not having high hopes for Maths. I was pretty surprise to see the number of familiar faces that's with DMS. The only difference between us is they're full time DMS students.

My paper today for English was okay. I was feeling a little tired at first so I took about 10mins of rest while I was doing the paper. I had many crazy ideas in my mind when I was doing my essay writings. Hopefully Im not out of point though. It's quite depressing to see my friend not in the hall to sit for the exam, she chose to opt out for this sem. Wonder how is she now. These past 2 days was a special bonding time for us 104th people. Everyone was so concern for one another. I was quite surprised with how everyone was helping one another out. It feels so secondary school, that weird familiarity. That close bond. Why does this always happens only when you've got like so little time left to spend with your mates?.

All the best to all of you 104th! get this last paper out! over and done with! and CHILLLLLLAX!!!! :)

Your thoughts control your feelings.

Inevitable

Some stuffs are just inevitable like the red shirt protesters that went on and on in BKK for the past few weeks, and eventually I've dropout from the trip. At first there was an alternative for me to head Japan with Cher as she was able to claim free tic for me through her mileage thingy from JAL but not for the month of June due to peak season, argh crap. Tell me, should I cancel away my June leave and save it for later part of the year? because I have no place to go in June already, the ticket to go PEK is too expensive, definitely not in June. Whereby air fares goes sky high. Hmmm, anyone got no plans in later part of June?, maybe Bintan or somewhere nearby?.

I've got tons of places I wanna go like Universal, MBS, RWS, Keppel Bay, Zoo, Museums, Malaysia-JUSCO and Holiday Inn Plaza, the firefly tour..etc the list just goes on. Hmm, where to find such ever ready khaki for a getaway?. Anywhere but BKK. Crap.

Gonna go on a date with Collin ( see,I've bold your name in your favourite colour ;p ) later in the day (: can't wait for him to come back. It's merely a day, and Im missing his presence..

how do I survive my mid-crisis?..October please reach me soon....

Happy valentine Day

Morning!! yes at this hour..well I've just finished watching "Valentine Day" on the laptop so yea, nice movie, should have caught it in the theaters though. Pretty much I got the whole idea of this heart warming show. Though Im here all ALONE watching it cus Mr Tan has to leave early to be the "AHMAD" for the day. He looked like a clown...HAHAHAHA!! I know I'm gonna get it from him. I DONT CARE!!! hahaha.

The time is just nice for me to go prepare now, I'll be wearing a weird looking top which I've bought like when I was in secondary 2? and never wore it till like NOW?!. ZzZ

OKay, back to TREASURE HUNTING!! =p

Umpteen times

Many times I've been telling myself that I want a better life. A life that I can throw my laziness away and be able to accomplish more freaking things in life. Testing of my own determination once again.
Wake up your freaking idea..JO!

At the end of the line, I've only got me,myself and I. PLEASE!! I needa freaking CHANGE ALREADY!!

BYE.

Breakfast

I must admit, mamo is a wonder woman, it took me one hour to get back home from the market and I've only bought like bread, beancurd, 2 packets of mee pok, and some hum jing peng, I swear I wanna cry for help already. My arms feels as though they dont belong to me anymore. LOL. Now I know why mamo rides the piyo piyo to the market. Not an easy job.

The way people stare at me at the market makes me feel so out of place. It made me feel so AUNTIE!! no more next time!! LOL.

Phuket with love

My parents have left for Phuket, leaving their offspring's behind in this sunny little tiny dot. So loving at such an old age. LOL!! Enjoy your trip over there, please keep your arguments to the lowest I hope.
Can't believe my folks actually beat me to Phuket first! damnit. I can so imagine their excited faces. Hahas, especially Daddy, behaves like a kid. LOL.

Wonder what they'll be up to over there. Phuket!! hmm just you wait.

Alrights, heading out for marketing now since the 2 young ones were up so early today to send the folks off. Shall get them some breakfast..

Ciaoz~

HAppy Birthday Mamo!! Enjoy your Phuket trip (:

Subjective

Quoted from a blog..

" It takes guts to change your life like you did.. U always have a choice.."

I've chose mine, and I'm sticking to it. I know what I'll have to face, I don't blame those that couldn't understand my decision.( I finally understand that feeling ).

At first it felt like total lost, cus people shun away from me. I'm standing there alone to fend for myself. I chose selective listening, and to face my consequences. It was difficult at first, like a mental struggle to go through, peeps that used to msg me everyday disappeared. I was actually affected by all these small little actions. Though there were some that told me it was okay, nothing wrong for me to choose this way. It's just in me, that I will feel so otherwise.

It didnt take me long to figure things out, to talk things out and to get it out of my system.

I've to learn to grow up, to move on.

Im really sorry to those that I've hurt, and I know sorry doesnt help the least bit in this context, nothing does. I don't seek for people's understanding for what I've chose.

Im thankful to those that still stood by me.

I ain't losing faith, because there's you. (:

fingers crossed.

Considering gettin a blue contacts.. it's the freaking GSS once again!!!

First out

Can I dont go tonight?. Seriously. Thinking of it feels so fucked up.
This sucks.

miss you.

Deserve it

Im struggling with my revision..GG

The Last Song

Headed out to town like after so many months away from it. Walked around Far East, Ion, Cine.. and I've got myself a skirt. Caught "The Last Song" and had Applebees for dinner. Not that fantastic though, maybe cus I didn't had the steak as I got myself spicy prawn arabiatta (if I didnt remember wrongly..)

My eyes feels kinda sore right now after the crying session from the movie kinda thought provoking..and the lifestyle there!! the weather, the beach, the house.....DANG!

People make mistakes, even your love ones.

I like Miley's hair, wavy and nice (:

Im dreading tomorrow or should I say later, it's my first BLR flight. Oh the mighty one up there, spare me more patience and understanding, I need it ALOT.

awake

I'm wide awake right now to fall asleep, thus I was blog hopping. Many went away for holiday, be it a short trip or a 2 weeks getaway. Everyone got their share of rest and relaxation! When is it my turn! YES IM JEALOUS!! VERY JEALOUS!! so what if I get to fly to so many different destinations? I dont see NOTHING!. LOL.UGH. My last ever trip by plane was Bangkok in 07, 3 years back balls! I've been seeing so much Taiwan, Japan, Hong Kong, Malaysia, Siem Reap etc.. pictures on FB, everyone's been going on long holidays! so nice.. I will work extra hard to save up the money for a well spent trip! Else I'll feel so unbalanced LOL!!

TIO BAO!!!

I was happily collecting my winning tiles in hope that I was able to break even at the end of the game. But, I proved myself otherwise. Who games a "chow ping hor with an ANG TIONG as eyes!!" UGH. Joke of the night.

I guess I need more training from viwawa. Pfffft`

Note to self: Never ever drool on the arm again! x_x"

You've got this loving feeling.. (:

=)

I'm not gonna hold on to the cup no more.
I'm glad there was you. :)

HABIT

I've got this bad habit of mine which is stuck to me for a long time. I tend to read my past entries whenever I feel lousy. It's like a reality check for me to see if I've improved or got worse, and apparently I'm like slipping back. This IS BAD. I've been staring into space too often than not lately. Motivation span for studies is dropping at an alarming rate.

I've been thinking of the meet up I had with Fang and Na the other day. And the future; still freaks me out. I can see changes in them, the way they talk about their future, how they have set their path/goals and moving forward. Whereas for myself, I see myself growing roots to the ground/ "hen-tak-kaki". I'm proud of my ladies, as in they have worked out their path well. Why I don't seem to have that spark in me?. I tend to focus on negativity than seeing things as an opportunity. I want to learn from my mistakes!

I used to give up on myself easily, get myself all crushed and hurt, as though the world owes me. I have tendency to indulge myself in pessimism, which Im dying to get rid of. Self-pity is pathetic. Live for yourself and not for others, for they are not the one that breathes life into you. Don't live with regrets, never allow anyone to bring you down.

Enough said, back to studies.

DMS

2 more lessons to go, and we're gonna sit for our very 1st paper. 10-1pm. GG. All the best people!